My daughter.

I was counting like The Count from Sesame Street.

"ONE scary zombie! muahaha! TWO scary zombies! muahaha! THREE ..."

When she started to finish for me by doing the "muahaha!" part.

I never knew I could love anyone so much.

Step (Mom)

The past couple weeks have been not really normal. In a way good, like pure summer. No chores allowed really. No errands. Nothing that was remotely resembling drudgery.

We had 2 pretty special visitors. My husbands kids.

We did alot of stuff. Alot of bike riding. Alot of time at parks, backyard volleyball, smores over our fire pit, family meals, swimming, excursions, crafty stuff, matinees. Oy. I wonder to myself "Will they be able to go home and say it was boring?". After these 2 weeks, I don't think so.

Stepmom is not a title most people relish. Trepidation is the main, predominating feeling I have towards that word. J and I have in the past had moments, clarifying roles, motivations and points of view. We see things differently, but I am grateful that by and large we approach the whole thing with empathy towards each other.

And the kids are good. They are good kids. I feel like I hardly know them, even after knowing them for 5 years, and I say that knowing that good kids, even the best kids, are still kids. And that means normal kid behavior.

The more time we have with them, the more normal it feels to have them around. It is our hope to establish familiarity with our family, as much is possible with kids we get to see about 3 weeks a year. They are a 30 hour drive away. Laws are such that mom can move them where ever she wishes. And their mom does. She also changes their last name to suit the current man in the house. But I won't go any further with that. It is illegal, but there is next to nothing we can do to stop her.

I won't accept the feeling that "step" anything is somehow "lesser", or "bad", or infers some misbehavior or lack of goodness. The way I have been taught, family is family, and these kids are family, and we show them nothing but love. My stepmom is awesome. Sometimes better than the real deal. I want to break that mold of bad step parenting, I think people expect less of themselves because that stigma exists.

Attached are pics...
messing around in the back yard

down at the east bank esplanade

the statues

With S jumping everywhere it was like the photographic olympics, can I catch these action shots at low light? By and large the answer was no. This one came out okay only because of the flash.

A la farra!

We had a party this weekend for A and J because their birthdays are on Wednesday. I am so indecisive about parties, I flip flopped on this one till I invited everyone a week ahead of time and didn't get out invites. We invited a boatload of folks. And they came! Our house was overflowing, which was fine and good by all standards, but I had been hoping for more sun so that people could overflow onto the porch.

I get overwhelmed at parties. I enjoy so much that people get to talk to connect and visit, and I love that I could make it happen. But sometimes I think all my guests would be happier if I just sat in a chair in a room upstairs tranquilized with something.

Our house has felt hectic, chaotic this weekend. I don't want to go into why. It is late. All I can say is that sometimes I wish I was the person who didn't seem to be phased by much, but there are somethings that throw me all for a loop, and I feel not myself.

Addy was a good girl at her party. Dad's labradoodle was there. Dad and Lynda seem to have a tug of war over putting the dog in and out. Sometimes I was glad that the dog was out even though it is a cute dog simply because there got to be too much underfoot. Addy was low key, seemed at home entertaining people while mom was slowly getting maxed out.

For me the highpoint was when our neighbors and a friend (a grandpa of sorts to Addy) went and hid easter eggs all over the house for the kids. Joe's eyes lit up. They are all grandmas and grandpas and I think they enjoyed that. Also my brother and his wife had made a little photo album of the time they spent with Addy. It was a "let's take pictures of how we abused Addy" while she stayed there about a month back. They took a picture of her drinking out of a bowl next to the dog, her at the top of the stairs on a skateboard, her with a bunch of nerf darts stuck all over her and Spenser with a malicious look on his face. It was pretty hilarious.

The party was a hit. When A came down the stairs and saw all the decorations in the morning in her little 2 year old voice she said "Look at that!" and then jumped up and down and said "I'ma happy girl!". Insert the sound of my heart melting all over the floor.

As an aside, I notice I wear alot more pink lately. A deep pink. It goes so nicely with everything. I decided it was because I am deeply happy. I need to remember that.

Twee

We live in Oregon, Christmas Tree land. Feast eyes, all those in balmy climes.

This was my first shooting experience with a real camera. A Canon EOS Digital Rebel. I am reading the manual and another book about getting better shots, actually getting better control of the camera. So this is my first time out. They could be worse, I suppose.


Surveying here. Scenes like this make me love Oregon.


I like this one even though it is a total bonehead shot. Er, what am I supposed to focus on? This camera is so fully automated, it is kind of like a hopped up point and shoot. This pic is the result of wanting to get shots, but not getting all my details squared, like turning off the AF.


I took about a hundred shots, mostly just to get the hang of the camera. I am still a little blown away by the difference between my previous camera and this one--the file size on the Kodak is about 800kb, this one a file size is 4.5 MB. It makes me sad to think of the time wasted on the Kodak, and the price of it...and the juice that dripped on it, and the sand that got in it, and the time wasted and the money wasted...


Back to the trees, while Jeff cut our tree that I picked out, I played. I admit, I walked away from this experience thinking "I have so much to learn,".


This is the tree in our living room, it is not decorated, it is just hanging out smelling good. I think this one could benefit from some Photoshop time.

I haven't purchased this camera, it is on loan to me from Jeff's work. I think it goes back tommorrow. I would post more pictures, except they take forever to upload. It is equipped for fast transfer of images, but my computer doesn't have a port for this. The camera is 600 dollar camera. The computer, well. This just looks like a hobby I probably cannot afford. Too bad!